What Is an Emotional Wound?

If you’ve hung around Writers Helping Writers at all over the past year, you’ll know that Angela and I have been kind of obsessed with character wounds. For the better part of the year, we built our Emotional Wound Thesaurus here at the blog and talked quite a bit in individual posts about the topic—because there’s a lot to discuss. Wounds are complex and impact our characters on so many levels.

I thought it would be helpful to provide a simple explanation for emotional wounds and why they’re so important for us to know as authors, so read on for an excerpt from the  Emotional Wound Thesaurus: A Writer’s Guide to Psychological Trauma.

Growing up, do you remember something happening that you didn’t expect, something that surprised you—and not in a good way? Maybe you came home with a third-place Science Fair ribbon, and rather than wrap you up in a breath-stealing hug and fawn over the yellow slip, your mother barely gave it a glance, declaring that you should have tried harder. Now, fast-forward to junior year. You auditioned for the lead in the school musical, but the part went to someone else. How did that feel, especially when you had to deliver the news to dear old mom? What about when you missed the cut for a university program that, as she likes to remind you, your brother got into with no problem, or the time you were passed over for a promotion and had to sit through an agonizing family dinner where your sibling was lauded for his accomplishments?

Chances are, this wounded past doesn’t match your own. But if it did, at what point would resentment set in over your mother’s love being withdrawn each time you failed to meet her unrealistic expectations? How long until you stopped talking about your goals or—even worse— refused to try at all because you believed you would only fail?

Unfortunately, life is painful, and not all the lessons we learn are positive ones. As with you and me, the characters in our stories have suffered emotional trauma that cannot easily be dispelled or forgotten. We call this type of trauma an emotional wound: a negative experience (or set of experiences) that causes pain on a deep psychological level. It is a lasting hurt that often involves someone close: a family member, lover, mentor, friend, or other trusted individual. Wounds may be tied to a specific event, arise upon learning a difficult truth about the world, or result from a physical limitation, condition, or challenge.

Whatever form they take, most wounding experiences happen unexpectedly, meaning, characters have little or no time to raise their emotional defenses. The resulting pain is brutal and immediate, and the fallout of this trauma has lasting repercussions that will change the character in significant (often negative) ways. As with us, characters experience many different painful events over a lifetime, including ones in their formative years. These wounds are not only the most difficult to move past, they often create a domino effect for other hurts that follow.

Now, you might ask why we should care about what happens to our characters before page one. After all, isn’t it what they do during the story that matters? Yes, and no. People are products of their pasts, and if we want our characters to come across as authentic and believable to readers, we need to understand their backstories too. How a character was raised, the people in her life, and the events and world conditions she was exposed to months or years ago will have direct bearing on her behavior and motives within the story. Backstory wounds are especially powerful and can alter who our characters are, what they believe, and what they fear most. Understanding the pain they’ve experienced is necessary to creating fully formed and compelling characters.

When we think of emotional trauma, we often imagine it as a specific moment that forever alters the character’s reality, but wounds can present in a variety of ways. It’s true that one may develop from a single traumatic event, such as witnessing a murder, getting caught in an avalanche, or experiencing the death of one’s child. But it can also come about from repeated episodes of trauma, like a series of humiliations at the hand of a workplace bully or a string of toxic relationships. Wounds may also result from a detrimental ongoing situation, such as living in poverty, childhood neglect caused by addicted parents, or growing up in a violent cult.

However they form, these moments leave a mark, albeit a psychological one, just as a physical injury does. Wounds damage our characters’ self-worth, change how they view the world, cause trust issues, and dictate how they will interact with other people. All of this can make it harder for them to achieve certain goals, which is why we should dig deep into their backstories and unearth the traumas they may have been exposed to…

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I hope this clarifies what a wound is and what kind of aftershocks it can have. It’s SO important for us to know this important event from each character’s past, and The Emotional Wound Thesaurus: A Writer’s Guide to Psychological Trauma is now available (print and digital). We hope you find it really helpful!

To see a sample entry, visit this page, or to browse our online version hosted at One Stop for Writers, where this thesaurus is part of the largest fiction-focused descriptive database available online.

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About BECCA PUGLISI

Becca Puglisi is an international speaker, writing coach, and bestselling author of The Emotion Thesaurus and its sequels. Her books are available in five languages, are sourced by US universities, and are used by novelists, screenwriters, editors, and psychologists around the world. She is passionate about learning and sharing her knowledge with others through her Writers Helping Writers blog and via One Stop For Writers—a powerhouse online library created to help writers elevate their storytelling. You can find Becca online at both of these spots, as well as on Facebook and Twitter.
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[…] is negative: character flaws which came into being in response to past hurts and fears caused by emotional wounds. And while we think this “emotional shielding” of dysfunctional behavior, attitudes, and biases […]

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[…] happiness, their self-worth, and causing mistrust and disillusionment to skew their worldview. This critical piece of backstory is key to understanding their motivations, and will impact their individual character’s arc, so […]

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[…] happiness, their self-worth, and causing mistrust and disillusionment to skew their worldview. This critical piece of backstory is key to understanding their motivations, and will impact their individual character’s arc, so […]

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[…] of wounding events, we each have defining moments from the past that we’re reluctant to share with others or even […]

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[…] Emotional wounds are tricky to write about. […]

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[…] Emotional wounds are tricky to write about. […]

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[…] saved this one for last because, when it comes to mirroring real life, nothing has the impact of an emotional wound. We’ve all experienced terrible things in our lives—singular events or repeated situations that […]

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[…] our characters’ backstories, we quickly come to find that the most formative element is the emotional wound — a terrible past experience that was so debilitating they’ll do anything to avoid going […]

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[…] happiness, their self-worth, and causing mistrust and disillusionment to skew their worldview. This critical piece of backstory is key to understanding their motivations, and will impact their individual character’s arc, so […]

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[…] What Is an Emotional Wound? […]

Adan Ramie
3 years ago

This couldn’t have come out at a better time. I’m currently gearing up to write my first horror novel – the story of a group of women who all suffered unspeakable tragedies in their past and must overcome them if they want to survive. Bookmarking this to refer back to it as I write!

ANGELA ACKERMAN
Admin
3 years ago
Reply to  Adan Ramie

So happy this will help!

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[…] If you are curious about emotional wounds for your characters, here’s the link. […]

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[…] just as it does the protagonist, but how this manifests through behavior will be darker. Uncovering the wounds of the past is a must because to write the villain’s dysfunctional behavior well, we need to know what caused […]

Sharon K Mayhew
Sharon K Mayhew
3 years ago

I can hardly wait for this to come out. The timing is going to be perfect. I’ll be querying my HF and working on a very damaged mc for a YA. So glad you did this one!

Bill K
Bill K
3 years ago

Hi Becca,

I love your Thesaurus work and, so far, have bought them all. (the print versions). So naturally I’m interested in this next one. Sounds remarkable. My only questions: 1) you’ve already blogged 53 wound examples of this. How will the printed version be different? How many more wounds does the book contain?

ANGELA ACKERMAN
Admin
3 years ago
Reply to  Bill K

HI Bill,

The book contains 118 different wounds, that have all been expanded from what you see at the blog. Each one has been carefully vetted by a psychologist too, ensuring the content is 100% accurate. And with all our books, only half the value is in the thesaurus entries…in many ways it is the teaching content that holds the most value as the lessons you take away will vastly improve your storytelling skills. (In my option at least!) ~ Angela