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WRITERS HELPING WRITERS®

WRITERS HELPING WRITERS®

Helping writers become bestselling authors

5 Techniques for Adding Subtext to your Story

June 14, 2012 by BECCA PUGLISI

Today we’ve invited Ollin Morales to clue us in about subtext–thank goodness, because while I know what it is, I’ve never understood how to add it to a story without confusing the readers and myself. Ollin’s blog is a Top Ten Blogs for Writers winner, and, as I’m sure you’ll agree once you’ve read his post, he knows his stuff. 

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teensAbout 90% of the time, we human beings don’t say what we mean to say. Instead, we speak in subtext. The beauty of subtext is that it makes human interaction fascinating; and, likewise, it’s what will make your story worth reading. If you, as a writer, can fundamentally understand the importance of subtext, I guarantee that you’ll see the benefit in adding it to you story.

What Is Subtext? The best way to explain it is with an example:

Boy meets girl. 

Boy asks girl: “Do you like Coldplay?”

Boy smiles. Girl frowns.

Girl says: “No, they suck.”

Boy asks: “Oh—what music do you like then?”

Boy walks towards girl. Girl steps back.

Girl blows a raspberry. 

Girl says: “I hate music.”

Boy says: “Oh. So, you wouldn’t be interested in going to a free concert?

Boy winks. 

Girl takes a moment to think about it. Then, Girl shakes her head. 

Boy shakes his head.

Boy says: “Okay, good-bye.”

Boy leaves. 

Girl takes a huge sigh of relief.

Now, if you take a quick, superficial look at this scene, you might conclude that not much happened in it, right? WRONG. A WHOLE LOT happened. It’s just that it’s hard to catch because it all happened “in between the lines.”

This is how the scene would read if there were NO SUBTEXT, and everyone in the scene was saying exactly what they meant to say:

Boy meets girl. 

Boy says: “I think you’re cute. “

Boy smiles. Girl frowns.

Girl says: “Thanks.”

Boy asks: “Are you single?”

Boy walks towards girl. Girl steps back.

Girl blows a raspberry. 

Girl says: “Yes. But I’m not interested in you.”

Boy asks: “Can I be your sugar daddy at least?”

Boy winks. Girl takes a moment to think about it. Then, Girl shakes her head. 

Boy shakes his head.

Boy says: “Okay, but you’re the one who’s missing out.” 

Boy leaves. 

Girl takes a huge sigh of relief.

Now do you see what really went on in the scene? You probably also recognized an interaction that happens all the time, in real life. Just like in real life, your human characters will never say what they really mean. What they really mean to say will be conveyed through subtext: unspoken words hidden “in between the lines.”

Now that we’ve learned what subtext is, here are 5 techniques you can use to add it to your story.

1. Give Your Character An Objective

We all have an objective, whether we realize it or not–“big picture” objectives (buying a house) and “small picture” objectives (going to the bathroom.) In the example above, we can see that the boy’s objective was to land a date with the girl, while the girl’s objective was to make it clear to the boy that she was not interested in him. Your characters should have something that drives them. The only thing that will drive them is an objective—a goal. Furthermore, having a goal will automatically add subtext to everything they say.

2. Give Your Character An Action

Now that the character has a goal, you have to give them the means by which they can achieve that goal. Try not having your character attempt to achieve his/her goal by deliberately asking for it. Instead, let them use their body language, or their tone of voice, to show what they  want. In the example I shared with you, the girl blows a raspberry at the boy to show the boy that she’s not interested in him. Blowing a raspberry (although childish) is an action the girl is taking to achieve her objective (making it clear to the boy that she’s not interested in him). Her action also provides a clue to her subtext.

Giving your character an action will help the reader read between the lines of your story—and it will also reveal what the character really wants without you having to explain what the character really wants.

3. Make Your Characters Talk In Gibberish

It might sound strange, but when you replace all your character’s dialogue with gibberish, the subtext is revealed (or at least hinted at). For instance:

Boy meets girl. 

Boy asks: “Je janga pota blub?”

Boy smiles. Girl frowns.

Girl says: “Glooby.”

Boy asks: “Jin go ploopa?”

Boy walks towards girl. Girl steps back.

Girl blows a raspberry.

Even though we have no idea what they’re saying, it’s pretty clear to us that this girl doesn’t like this boy. How do we know that, if all they did was talk in gibberish? SUBTEXT. If you replace your character’s dialogue with gibberish and it’s impossible to know what’s going on, then it probably means you have to develop more subtext. On the other hand, if you did a great job of developing the subtext of the story, then your reader should have a general idea of what’s going on in the scene—even when the characters are talking nonsense.

4. Give Your Character A Secret

When you give a character a secret, it instantly makes them more interesting—and boy will there be subtext galore.

5. Give A Character A Secret About Another Character

What is more tantalizing than a character with a secret? A character who knows another character’s secret. When you put those two characters together in a room it makes for a very fascinating scene—chock full of delicious delicious subtext. Yum!

Good luck!

Hopefully, today, you learned something new: that human beings all talk in subtext and that if you want to create intriguing, believable characters, they’ll have to talk in subtext, too. By utilizing these five techniques, you’ll not only vastly improve your ability to create subtext, but you’ll probably never look at human interactions the same way again.

Ollin Morales is a fiction writer,  freelance writer, blogger, and ghostwriter. His blog, Courage 2 Create, chronicles his journey as he writes his first fiction novel. His blog offers writing advice as well as strategies to deal with life’s tough challenges. His blog was named one of The Top Ten Blogs for Writers by WriteToDone two years in a row (2011, 2012).

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BECCA PUGLISI
BECCA PUGLISI

Becca Puglisi is an international speaker, writing coach, and bestselling author of The Emotion Thesaurus and its sequels. Her books are available in five languages, are sourced by US universities, and are used by novelists, screenwriters, editors, and psychologists around the world. She is passionate about learning and sharing her knowledge with others through her Writers Helping Writers blog and via One Stop For Writers—a powerhouse online library created to help writers elevate their storytelling.

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Filed Under: Characters, Experiments, Guest Post, Show Don't Tell, Subtext, Writing Craft, Writing Lessons

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Laura says

    February 20, 2016 at 2:29 pm

    This gave me some excellent ideas for a scene I’m currently writing. Thank you so much. I feel like I can conquer the rest of this chapter like a pro!

  2. Gordie Eggleston says

    December 12, 2015 at 11:25 pm

    I often find myself converting my characters dialogue to gibberish when reading it aloud… but only for the purpose of gauging the cadence. Now I realize I should do this as a two-pronged exercise! Thank for the advice!

  3. Valerie Strawmier says

    June 19, 2012 at 11:48 pm

    I love how you interact with your characters in this post and I can’t wait to share this with my followers! Thanks for posting!

  4. Julie Musil says

    June 18, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    Ollin, this was so great! I absolutely love the tip about plating gibberish to see if the subtext shines through. Thanks so much!

  5. Owllady says

    June 17, 2012 at 3:59 pm

    This trait could overlap with Naivete to add something interesting, I think. I always prefer characters who exhibit more than one clear trait.

  6. Monica T. Rodriguez says

    June 15, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    This is terrific. I’ve always known subtext was an important element, but it’s been much harder to hit the right note. This post makes it clear what I need to do. And the gibberish trick is brilliant! Thanks!

  7. LTM says

    June 15, 2012 at 9:38 am

    I LOVE me some subtext! And this is the best breakdown I’ve ever seen of how to do it well. I love that the Boy sounds a bit like Jar Jar Binks–LOL! 😀

    All that bit about the secrets is very good, too. And you’re so right. What’s more interesting that #4-5? Great post, thanks, A, B & Ollin! <3

  8. Becca Puglisi says

    June 15, 2012 at 12:09 am

    I love this post, Ollin. Like so many others, the gibberish technique is totally resonating with me. What a fabulous way to make sure your character’s body language and actions are conveying the right message. Thanks so much for sharing your insight with us!

  9. J.W. Alden says

    June 14, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    I recently had a battle with subtext in a story I’m shopping around. I had a scene with two characters, who used to be allies but have been pulled apart by circumstance. They have a dialog exchange in which Character A lets Character B know that he’s now an enemy with a target on his back, all in a public place where B is in a position of authority and safe from hostility. So the surface dialog is actually B paying his respect to A in front of everyone, but the subtext is “Enjoy this comfort while you can–you messed up and we’re coming for you.”

    It was a challenge, but great fun to write. I love scenes with heavy subtext, both as a reader and a writer. Great post!

    J.W. Alden

  10. Tara Tyler says

    June 14, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    great advice and examples! love it!
    and secrets always make great plot twists!

  11. ollinmorales says

    June 14, 2012 at 3:24 pm

    @Cynthia Chapman Willis @Bish Denham @Dayner – yes, I suggest trying to speak the dialogue out loud, and play it as if it was a scene with partner. See what body language you have to create to get your point across without saying it directly. Good luck!

    @Laura Pauling Yummy! Secrets! The best stories all have great secrets. 🙂

    @Rashna @Riv Re @Susanne @Traci – Thank you. I’m so glad it was clear and helpful to all of you.

    Thanks Angela and Becca for having me on Bookshelf Muse! I feel so honored and your readers are so kind and wonderful! Thank you.

  12. ollinmorales says

    June 14, 2012 at 3:20 pm

    @Fiona Ingram Yay! I’m glad it helped you.

    @Laurel Garver It’s even better when you read the dialogue out loud with a friend! It’s so much fun and illuminating.

    @Angela Ackerman Thank you so much! I’m flattered. You know I spent about 4 years studying subtext: I was a drama major with a focus on acting. And actors, well, that’s all we do is subtext! So I know subtext very deeply.

  13. ollinmorales says

    June 14, 2012 at 3:17 pm

    @ElaineSmith Yes! Gibberish works wonders!

    @GwynethWhite Yay! I love when that happens. When right advice comes at the right time, you must have been asking for it?

    @NatalieAguirre It’s also just how human beings talk–and that’s what makes us humans so fascinating. We never say what we mean to say–we really are one hot mess. Haha!

  14. Traci Kenworth says

    June 14, 2012 at 1:57 pm

    Great lessons!!

  15. Susanne Drazic says

    June 14, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    This was a great post. Thanks for the examples.

  16. Riv Re says

    June 14, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    Book. Marked. Thanks so much, this was really helpful!

    ~Riv Re
    Riv Reads

  17. Rachna Chhabria says

    June 14, 2012 at 12:17 pm

    Very interesting post. It explained the subtext quite clearly.

  18. Laura Pauling says

    June 14, 2012 at 11:54 am

    Awesome! I absolutely love secrets. When there are secrets in a story I always keep reading! Great post!

  19. dayner says

    June 14, 2012 at 11:49 am

    Great article. Can’t wait to try the gibberish technique.

  20. Bish Denham says

    June 14, 2012 at 10:22 am

    I agree with Cynthia! Using gibberish really helps to understand if subtext is working or not. Thanks, great info!

  21. Cynthia Chapman Willis says

    June 14, 2012 at 10:05 am

    Replacing dialogue with gibberish is brilliant. Not only does it ensure the use of body language, but I imagine it helps the writer to create body language specific to each character, too.

  22. Angela Ackerman says

    June 14, 2012 at 9:55 am

    This is one of the clearest articles on subtext I’ve read–love the gibberish technique…that’s a great way to ensure body language is being fed into the scene!

    Thanks so much for hanging out with us, Ollin!

    Angela

  23. Laurel Garver says

    June 14, 2012 at 9:37 am

    The gibberish technique is fascinating. What a great way to test whether you have enough body language in scenes to help underscore the subtext. Love it.

  24. Fiona Ingram says

    June 14, 2012 at 9:10 am

    Great post. I am busy editing my manuscript so this advice has come in handy!

  25. Natalie Aguirre says

    June 14, 2012 at 7:01 am

    Thanks Ollin for the great advice. Adding subtext makes the story so much more interesting because we the reader has to figure out what’s really being said. Thanks for all the techniques to do it.

  26. Gwynneth White says

    June 14, 2012 at 6:42 am

    Just what I needed today with a challenge I’m having in my writing. Obviously sent by the angels. Thank you
    Gwynneth

  27. Elaine Smith says

    June 14, 2012 at 4:18 am

    I loved this post. Thank you. I never thought I’d be checking if my scenes work by turning the dialogue into gibberish but I’m going to have a lot of fun trying it out *grins

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