Successful stories are driven by authentic and interesting characters, so it’s important to craft them carefully. But characters don’t usually exist in a vacuum; throughout the course of your story, they’ll live, work, play, and fight with other cast members. Some of those relationships are positive and supportive, pushing the protagonist to positive growth and helping them achieve their goals. Other relationships do exactly the opposite—derailing your character’s confidence and self-worth—or they cause friction and conflict that leads to fallout and disruption. Many relationships hover somewhere in the middle. A balanced story will require a mix of these dynamics.
The purpose of this thesaurus is to encourage you to explore the kinds of relationships that might be good for your story and figure out what each might look like. Think about what a character needs (good and bad), and build a network of connections for him or her that will challenge them, showcase their innermost qualities, and bind readers to their relationship trials and triumphs.
The following is just a sample of the content available for this relationship. To see it in its entirety (along with 45+ additional relationship entries), check out our Description Thesaurus Collection at One Stop For Writers.
Giver and Taker
Description: In this codependent relationship, each party gets something that they need, but in an unhealthy manner. The giver goes to great lengths to please and help the taker, often sacrificing their own needs, desires, health, and mental well-being to serve the other person. This can result in the giver being abused, neglected, taken advantage of, or otherwise mistreated by the taker. In the end, they both benefit, albeit dysfunctionally: the taker gets someone to care for them while the giver gets what they need (gaining the taker’s approval, finding purpose in serving them, etc.).
This dynamic can be found in any pairing—between spouses, friends, a parent and child, coach and athlete, boss and employee, etc.
Clashing Personality Trait Combinations:
Controlling and Rebellious, Perfectionist and Flaky, Extravagant and Thrifty, Cruel and Oversensitive, Manipulative and Weak-Willed, Pushy and Independent, Needy and Apathetic
Negative Outcomes of Friction
Physical abuse
Emotional abuse
The taker’s self-esteem plummeting
Ways This Relationship May Lead to Positive Change
Either party seeing an example of a healthy relationship and wanting it personally
Regaining a healthy relationship through self-revelation and therapy
Themes and Symbols That Can Be Explored through This Relationship
Beginnings, Deception, Depression, Enslavement, Family, Freedom, Friendship, Health, Hope, Instability, Isolation, Journeys, Love, Obstacles, Perseverance, Sacrifice, Suffering, Transformation
Other Relationship Thesaurus entries can be found here.
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Becca Puglisi is an international speaker, writing coach, and bestselling author of The Emotion Thesaurus and its sequels. Her books are available in five languages, are sourced by US universities, and are used by novelists, screenwriters, editors, and psychologists around the world. She is passionate about learning and sharing her knowledge with others through her Writers Helping Writers blog and via One Stop For Writers—a powerhouse online library created to help writers elevate their storytelling.