Fight, Flight, or Freeze: What’s Your Character’s Go-To Response?

Fight, flight, or freeze.

I think we’ve all heard variations of this phrase. It refers to the way each person is hard-wired to react to real or perceived danger: we fight back, we flee, or we freeze up. This happens in life-or-death situations, but it also occurs on a smaller scale whenever we feel endangered:

At the mall, when you see someone who mistreated you in the past
At work, when the boss criticizes your work
At a party, when a friendly conversation takes an uncomfortable turn
At school, when you hear an ugly rumor someone has started about you

Another reaction worth noting is the fawn response, which involves a character’s attempts to defuse the threat through appeasement. Fawning often develops in people who have experienced mistreatment, abuse, or volatile relationships because they’ve learned that placating is safer and more effective than other responses to fear. While not a hardwired response like fight, flight, or freeze, fawning can become ingrained through repeated use, making it common enough to consider for your character.

Whether your character’s situation is potentially fatal or just a little threatening, they’re going to respond in one of those three ways. What does that look like? Here are few possibilities that cover a range of intensity.

Fight Responses

Confronting the offending party
Invading their personal space
Shifting the conversation to something that will make the other person uncomfortable
Verbally or physically attacking the person
Seeking revenge

Flight Responses

Subtly changing the subject
Taking a step back or turning slightly away from the group when a conversation becomes uncomfortable
Avoiding certain people, places, or topics
Literally fleeing—moving away from the source of discomfort
Laughing it off; acting like there is no threat

Freeze Responses

Not answering when one is addressed
Stumbling to a halt
Feeling paralyzed, as if one is physically unable to move
Squeezing the eyes shut and going still

Fawn Responses

Apologizing (even if they haven’t done anything wrong)
Speaking in a soft tone
Using deliberately careful and non-threatening movements
Flattering the other person to deescalate a situation

Because your character will encounter real or perceived danger (multiple times, hopefully) as their story progresses, it’s important to know which way they’ll lean. Figuring out their fear response early on can help in a number of ways.

Fear Responses Help with Characterization

While every character’s specific response to threats will be unique, they’ll each have a general tendency toward one of the four Fs. We need to know these tendencies so we can write them consistently. This is especially important for main characters—protagonists, villains, love interests, etc.—because they’ll have more screen time. More things will be happening to them, providing more opportunities for reactions.

So before you start writing, ask yourself: Is this character more likely to fight, flee, freeze, or fawn in a threatening situation? When that scenario arises in the story, you’ll know their general reaction. Then you can individualize it to fit the character.

Fear Responses Help You Plan Your Story

Threatening scenarios—even small-scale ones—are tension builders, so you’ll include many of them in your story. But sometimes you’re looking for a certain kind of response: you need the character to run away, do nothing (avoiding the problem and allowing it to worsen), or go on the attack (causing more problems).

Once you’ve done your research and it’s time to start writing scenes, you can then conduct a casting call: use the characters who will serve your story best in that moment. If a scene needs conflict but your protagonist tends to shy away from trouble, team them up with a friend, coworker, or rival who is impulsive or thrives on confrontation. If you don’t want to kill the tension by resolving a problem too quickly, pair a fighter with someone who’s reluctant to act.

Each scene needs different things. (For more help on planning and structuring at this level, check out One Stop for Writers’ Informal and formal Scene Maps). The more you know about your characters beforehand, the better equipped you‘ll be to figure out who should be involved in various parts of the story.

Fear Responses Hint at Hidden Emotion

Let’s face it: none of us are 100% honest. We temper our words to accommodate the people around us. We hide our true opinions. We only show “safe” emotions—the ones that don’t make us feel vulnerable in the moment. This leads to us often hiding what we really feel.

Characters should do the same. When they feel threatened or vulnerable, they’ll try to hide that by conveying a false emotion.

Writing hidden emotion can be tricky because you have to show the false emotion to the rest of the cast while revealing the real emotion to the reader. There are a number of ways to effectively get this information across, and one of them is through the fight-flight-or-freeze response. Consider the following example from The Emotional Wound Thesaurus:

Sara poured sugar in her coffee and stirred, the clink of the spoon melodic against the cozy murmur of voices from neighboring tables. Sunlit, with a breeze coming off the water, the outdoor café was so peaceful this time of day—before the high school kids took it over.

“I like this place,” Mom said, blowing on her tea. “It reminds me of where I used to go as a girl.”Sara smiled and leaned back, the wooden seat slats warming her skin. “The place with the éclairs?”

“Mmmm. That’s the one.” Mom took a sip, then her eyebrows shot up. “Oh, a friend of yours showed up at Mass on Sunday. Annemarie? Marybeth?” She shook her head. “Something with two names.”

Sara jerked, dousing her hand in hot coffee. She set the cup down with a clatter and shrugged. Don’t know who you mean.

“My memory these days—I swear.” Mom sighed. “She said you worked together last summer during your internship.”

Sara met her mother’s gaze, which showed curiosity instead of the horror that would be there if she knew the truth.

“Doesn’t ring a bell.” Sara grabbed the check. “’I’ll get this. Hey, how’s your yoga class going?”

Here we see signs of a flight response. When Sara’s mom mentions the girl from the past, Sara immediately goes on high alert. She doesn’t show this; overtly, she acts like nothing has changed. So how do we know she’s upset? She gives the barest reaction possible: a shrug. No verbal reply at all. You can almost hear Sara silently begging her mom to let it go. When she doesn’t, Sara’s flight response escalates in the form of her wrapping up their outing and changing the subject.

There are other clues that Sara is hiding her emotion, such as the initial involuntary jerk, the clarity of her thoughts, and the overall change in mood (from a calm, casual lunch date to one charged with tension). When you combine her flight response with these other signals, it becomes clear that she’s not being forthright.

As you can see, her fear response is rooted in real-life behavior, and knowing which tendency is most likely for our characters can add a sense of realism and authenticity to our writing. So take the time to figure this out, and you’ll reap the benefits in stronger characterization, well-balanced scenes, and deeper, more layered emotional responses.

If you’d like to learn more about fear’s role in fiction and how to use it to engage readers, The Fear Thesaurus: A Writer’s Guide to What Holds Characters Back has more information for you.