Sourced from The Conflict Thesaurus
EXAMPLES
A love interest’s old flame showing up and wanting to resume a relationship
Someone new expressing a desire for the character’s love interest
Being “just friends” with someone, yet wanting more when competition shows up
A rival seeking ways to hurt the character, including stealing their love interest
The character dating someone who won’t agree to be exclusive
MINOR COMPLICATIONS
Having to find ways to one-up the competition
Having to go to a special event solo because the character lost to the competitor
Distraction causing trouble at work, at school, and in other areas of responsibility
Having to work twice as hard to be noticed by the love interest
Being teased or pitied by friends
Time lost to worry and anxiety
Jealousy creeping into the relationship, triggering arguments
Discomfort at putting oneself out there (if the character hasn’t made their feelings known to the love interest)
POTENTIALLY DISASTROUS RESULTS
Jealousy that gets out of hand and causes a breakup
Getting caught spying on the love interest while they’re out with the competition
Becoming obsessed and driving the love interest toward the competition
Losing the love interest because the character demanded they make a choice
Turning the love interest off by trying to buy their affection
Pretending to be interested in someone else and it backfiring
Getting into an altercation with a rival, spurring the love interest to walk away from both parties
Desperation pushing the character to do something that ends in humiliation, like publicly popping the question and being rejected
Losing oneself in the race to win the love interest’s affection (becoming obsessed with one’s looks, losing weight, bulking up in an unhealthy way, striving for a certain social status, etc.)
Giving up, then living with regret
Breaking up and developing a new emotional wound: unrequited love
RESULTING EMOTIONS: Anticipation, Anxiety, Defeat, Depressed, Desire, Despair, Desperation, Determination, Disappointment, Doubt, Envy, Hopefulness, Humiliation, Hurt, Inadequate, Insecurity, Intimidated, Jealousy, Loneliness, Longing, Love, Obsessed, Self-Pity
POSSIBLE INTERNAL STRUGGLES
Insecurity causing neediness that leads to self-loathing
Anguish over the partner’s indecision
Feeling “not good enough” but also angry for being made to feel that way
Being ashamed of one’s anger toward the rival, since he or she is really a good person
Wrestling with trust issues regarding the love interest
Wanting to share negative information about the rival but not wanting to be viewed as jealous or catty
Being tempted to cross a moral line to come out ahead
Wanting to be free of the situation but loving the other person too much to let go
The character becoming confused about which is more important: winning the love interest or beating the other person
NEGATIVE TRAITS THAT MAY WORSEN THE SITUATION: Catty, Childish, Confrontational, Controlling, Dishonest, Foolish, Impulsive, Insecure, Melodramatic, Needy, Nosy, Obsessive, Paranoid, Possessive, Pretentious, Pushy, Reckless, Suspicious, Whiny
IMPACT ON BASIC NEEDS
Esteem and Recognition: Learning about a competitor can create all sorts of problems with the character’s self-esteem. Having someone to measure herself against can shake her confidence, bring out insecurities, and play havoc with her emotions. This might cause her to behave erratically, doing things she might not normally do that will cause embarrassment, humiliation, shame, or regret.
Love and Belonging: A competitor showing up can shake the foundation of your character’s existing relationship—depending on the love interest’s reaction. If they are entertaining the idea of trading her in for someone else, this could push them to do so. If your character loses the love interest because she never let her feelings be known, this can lead her to believe unhealthy or untrue things about herself, making it more difficult for her to pursue a romance in the future.
Safety and Security: Depending on how obsessive the character is and how far she may go to win the heart of the one she loves, she may burn through her savings. This can lead to financial strain if the character overextends herself and has bills to pay.
POSITIVE TRAITS TO HELP THE CHARACTER COPE: Affectionate, Charming, Creative, Flirtatious, Funny, Easygoing, Kind, Loyal, Passionate, Patient, Perceptive, Persistent, Persuasive, Playful, Sensual, Sentimental, Whimsical
POSITIVE OUTCOMES
The appearance of a new competitor nudging the love interest toward appreciating and valuing the character more
The character reflecting on whether the relationship is worth fighting for or not
A character finally finding the strength to push through the mental blocks that are holding them back and voice their true feelings to the love interest
A character who has a hard time seeing her own strengths finding clarity when she compares herself to the other person and finds them lacking
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See the list of entries from Volume 1 of The Conflict Thesaurus
See the list of entries from Volume 2 of The Conflict Thesaurus
