Fear Thesaurus Entry: Being Pitied

Debilitating fears are a problem for everyone, an unfortunate part of the human experience. Whether they’re a result of learned behavior as a child, are related to a mental health condition, or stem from a past wounding event, these fears influence a character’s behaviors, habits, beliefs, and personality traits. The compulsion to avoid what they fear will drive characters away from certain people, events, and situations and hold them back in life. 

In your story, this primary fear (or group of fears) will constantly challenge the goal the character is pursuing, tempting them to retreat, settle, and give up on what they want most. Because this fear must be addressed for them to achieve success, balance, and fulfillment, it plays a pivotal part in both character arc and the overall story.

This thesaurus explores the various fears that might be plaguing your character. Use it to understand and utilize fears to fully develop your characters and steer them through their story arc. Please note that this isn’t a self-diagnosis tool. Fears are common in the real world, and while we may at times share similar tendencies as characters, the entry below is for fiction writing purposes only.

Being Pitied

Notes
Pity almost always comes from a good place, from people who care and only want to help. But some people don’t want pity or sympathy for others because it makes them feel weak or inferior. When pity is accompanied by patronization, superiority, or passive-aggressiveness, it can cause the recipient to repel anyone’s attempt to show concern for them.

What It Looks Like
A strong work ethic
Independence
Rejecting charity
…

Common Internal Struggles
The character believing they’re somehow inferior to or worth less than others
Wanting to be considered equal with others but secretly resenting those who have an easy life
Wanting to help others in need but not wanting to show pity
…

Flaws That May Emerge
Defensive, Dishonest, Grumpy, Judgmental, Perfectionist, Resentful, Uncooperative, Ungrateful

Hindrances and Disruptions to the Character’s Life
Not getting the help they need because they never ask
Relationships remaining somewhat surface because of the character’s difficulty opening up about their problems
The character being overworked or resorting to desperate measures to care for themselves
…

Scenarios That Might Awaken This Fear
Being thrust into an unfortunate situation (homelessness, bankruptcy, a terminal illness, etc.) 
Being offered support from well-intentioned friends or family members
Dealing with an overbearing caregiver
…

Other Fear Thesaurus entries can be found here.

Fear is a Crucial Piece of Your Character’s Arc

Fear will hold your character back in the story and affect how they see themselves and the world. It’s defining, determining who they are at the start of your story and what they’ll have to overcome to succeed in the end. Don’t overlook or underestimate this vital piece of the character’s arc.

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