Ever feel like you’re having such a hard day or week or month that you’re not sure how to write anything at all? You’re not alone.
Recently, someone in the writing community on Substack posted the following: “Don’t you love it when you don’t work on your WIP for three months and then you write 2,000 words in an hour, out of the blue, because you are stressed about life and don’t know how else to heal your soul besides write?”
First of all, 2,000 words in an hour is nothing short of amazing! Second of all—aside from being impressed by the word count, I found myself shaking my head. If we find that we are writing—or not writing—as a direct result of our emotional state, it’s going to be difficult to meet any of our long-term goals. While cathartic writing definitely has its place, it’s imperative that we learn to make the shift from writing reactively to writing intentionally. Here are four ways to help you make that shift:
1. Learn to View Your Writing as Work That You Do, Instead of as an Extension of Yourself
Shifting your mindset from “I bleed every word from the depth of my soul” to “I work hard at my writing, which exists apart from me” will free you from the paralysis that happens when angst and art collide. We all have days when we don’t feel well or our car breaks down or we read something scary in the news. Or days when we receive a rejection from our dream agent or read a line-edit that makes us feel like we’ve got the writing skills of a second-grader. In other words, life happens. But with a line firmly drawn between who you are (a capable human) and what you do (write stories), you’ll have the strength to “Keep Calm and Write.”
2. Pull Back from the Negativity of Social Media and the News
Our nervous systems were not designed to handle the inundation of bad—and sometimes horrific—news that’s available to us. By continuing to feed our minds and hearts with upsetting videos and sensationalized coverage of traumatic events, we are inadvertently keeping ourselves in fight-or-flight mode.
What does that mean for our creative process? Well, for some of us, it’s going to mean “I can’t write.” For others, it might look like, “All I can do is write all the words I can about how upset I am right now.” Which, again, is a valid thing to do. But if your angst is getting in the way of productive writing, you’ve got a problem on your hands.
Protecting yourself from the constant onslaught of negativity is protecting your craft as well. Get out in nature, read a (real, made-from-a-tree) book, spend an entire morning with your bestie in your favorite coffee shop. Don’t allow the doom-and-gloom around you to steal your peace and creativity.
3. Grow a Thick Skin That Can Handle Disappointment, Critique, and Distraction
You’ve probably heard this one before. Writing is hard on its own, and learning to continue writing through inevitable disappointments and setbacks is critical to your success as a writer.
Growing a thick skin may make sense to you in the context of disappointment and critique. After all, no one feels happy about a rejection letter or negative review, and no writer is going to feel like throwing a party after reading rough feedback.
It’s the distraction part that may need your attention. Because every social media post or news clip reminding you of the latest horror is doing just that—it’s distracting you from your work.
Am I telling you to stick your head into the proverbial sand? Of course not! But there’s a difference between keeping your fingertips lightly on the pulse of current events—and getting swallowed by them. The former is responsible; the latter, self-destructive.
4. If You Are Seriously Struggling to Overcome Emotions That Paralyze You, Consider Counseling
As someone whose life has been immeasurably improved thanks to a gifted therapist, I’m a big fan of getting help when we need it.
Writers fall under the umbrella category of “creatives”, who tend to think bigger and feel bigger and respond bigger. (Note: “bigger” doesn’t necessarily mean “louder”.) And sometimes we might need a little help learning to regulate our emotions.
Because honestly? It’s not okay to simply stop writing for six months because you’re stressed. Or abandoning your manuscript because your boyfriend broke up with you. Or feeling guilty about writing a lighthearted middle grade novel because something terrible just happened in the world.
We’ve got to feel our feelings—they’re what make us distinctly human. But if those feelings are calling the shots and either keeping us from writing or channeling our writing into an outpouring of emotional frenzy? Something needs to change.
Ultimately, our writing should be an intentional, sustainable practice that doesn’t wax and wane according to what’s going on around us. Your stories are your gift to the world–so why not do whatever it takes to make sure you can keep writing them?
Learning to write when it feels hard may just become your superpower!
Summary for busy writers: Big emotions can derail our writing. This article details 4 ways we can guard against this.
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6 Comments. Leave new
Great post, Jill. I know for me, the more I have to track, the less motivated I get. I like to work on one thing at a time but this career doesn’t really allow for that. I find that I have to carve out solid blocks of time to be productive in writing…and deadlines! Deadlines help, too.
If, though, the mental/creative juice I need to write well isn’t there, I take a break. That will be better for me recovering and refilling my well than just forcing it.
A hundred percent! And I’m also a big fan of self-imposed deadlines.
Mindset is everything, isn’t it? The days I’m least motivated to work are the ones where I wake up thinking about and focusing on something else, and it’s hard to get into the groove. And vice versa—if there’s something important I need to handle that day but I wake up thinking about work, I struggle. Dedicating some time in the morning to focus on what I need to do that day is often enough to get me moving in the right direction.
Yep–it all comes back to intentionality. Instead of wave-riding!
Thanks so much for this helpful post, Jill. I really needed this right now. (((Hugs)))
I love how you suggest counseling. It’s made such a huge difference in my life! I went to a writing workshop where the speaker had us say the negative things we’ve heard in our heads and smash a metal can with a hammer for each one. So many writers believed they just had to get through those words and couldn’t get rid of them, but with the help of therapy, I learned that we have the power to challenge and reframe them. Now, when any writing doubts creep in…I’m ready to battle them. 🙂
Another thing that’s helped me through tough writing times is to surround myself with positive sayings. I have my words for each year on sticky notes next to my laptop (some are…thrive, believe, bloom and sparkle). There’s also kind things my agent and others have said about me, inspiring quotes for writers that Lorin Oberweger put on cardstock, and sayings like: I am enough.
((((all the hugs))))
Yes to reframing! It really is a life-changing skill.
I tend to put positive words on the bulletin board by my desk as well. One of the most recent is a little snippet from an email a writing student recently sent me. It says, “This thought came to me as I was thinking of you and your writing style–A garden of flowers…Beauty for the eyes…Solace for the soul.” Talk about lifting me up!